Monday, September 20, 2010

Order out of Chaos

(originally an email to a dear friend of mine)

I just had a set of revelations that feel very strong and actually useful as a foundation towards understanding. To properly describe them I'd have to take you for a longer and bigger ride above all that we know or even could know and right back to where we are and have been. One of the fruits of my thoughts is hinted in the subjectline, but the meaning is slightly different from what we thought we understood.

Logic. As part of our indoctrination we are being taught to associate logic with coldness, the negative nature of predictability and the idea of rigidity. We're being put under the impression that creativity defies logic and human emotions are merely compromised by the confines of a paradigm such as logic. It's at best a useful approach towards humanless procedures, a precision tool, but nothing to lead a life by, right?!

The forces of chaos gave us this and hide behind the idea that logic contains lifeless evil and chaos contains hope. Destiny is a curse, fate a horrible idea and freedom and free will go against both, right?

Now it will get a bit complicated, so, please, bare with me...

You might have heard of the theory that the beginning of "our" universe happened not by means of a "big bang" through a singularity, but by the intersection of two universes colliding, have you? What happened there was that two different kinds of - let's just call it- "plasmas" intermingled, got mixed up and clumped into what ended up as the matter we perceive and are "made of". It created tremendous chaos and spued all throughout both "bubbles", so to say. The means of dimensions received a vital relevance as everything had started to require reconstruction from the ground up just to separate the plasma of one universe from the other or lead to some kind of solution. Whether it's the separation of both again or a unifying of them, matter is a kind of immune-response to chaos, being introduced by the sudden mix up of two (probably) independent entities. Further more, matter is a state of lower dimensions, such as the one we are in.

What are dimensions?

Well, in my model as I had pondered over an observation, when I was developing the math for polygon rasterization, dimensions are states of repetitions of all lower dimensions. The dimension itself represents a building block for the next dimension. Using a pixel as "singularity" to represent the 1st dimension, making a line requires the repetition of this very pixel to a new location. To make a surface it requires the transforming repetition of the line. To make a volume it requires a transforming repetition of a surface. To move it over time you need to repeat the volume with a transformation. To vibrate energy you need to repeat the transformation of the volume through time with a transformation and so on, and so on, and so on. This gets incredibly complex and we're not even at dimension Nr.6. To make sense of our world as we can actually observe it, we already have to climb to the 11th or 12th dimension. It has incredible complexity as it is and is far beyond our practical understanding. Yet, we do not even know, whether we represent the last step, the last repetition before the ideal form is reached. And that's exactly where this thought is leading to.

Whole again.

When we paint a shape, we ordinarily envision something and then translate the vision to the medium, let's say the paper. We kind of know the shape and then, essentially, trace our idea. Depending on our degree of ability we might do exactly what we had envisioned, or we agree on rather accidental variations towards an approximation of what we thought of. Along the way we
encounter mistakes, we draw a line roughly until we believe it's goal is reached and then move on to the next step. It's, even while preconceived to some degree, a very organic approach into the actually, factually unkown. More than many other examples, this might describe our real existence most accurately, but at a level that almost always escapes our imagination. Our complexity is naturally far higher than just a line, but maybe, just maybe we are simply trying to achieve our ideal state by which it becomes known that our contribution to our dimension is completed. The result of this should either be the unity of both universes becoming one again, or each universe becoming one again in itself. No matter how to look at it, it's about returning to a state of harmony, a state of logic.

Along the way, within the chaos, matter has encountered critical mass, so to say, by means of "selfawareness". It's that exact state that is misunderstood and incomplete. In this state the idea of survival as the medium itself became so relevant, that certain entities decided to remain as they are afraid to lose themselves. They wouldn't or couldn't recognize that we are all meant to sort out the differences to become one again, to swing in harmony. To do so we simply have to follow our real instincts, which are far beyond that which we are made to consider as primitive. Our creativity wants to lead us towards logic and makes the wonders of it more and more appearant to us. No matter what they try to inject into the media we discover to use, we recognize the satisfying beauty of logic and can learn from it to apply such simple logic to the foundation of our lives, using nature logically, using the sun, the universe logically, become one with matter again. But the forces of chaos fight against it with all their might. It is their order that tries to keep us away from unifying, away from discovering and practicing our best, the best of our abilities, the best of our understanding.

Order out of chaos does not represent a sequence of events, but the actual state we are in. It describes our system as the order that chaos is forcing on us.

How to go against it. Hmmmm... in my current state of understanding, it's most important to listen to our hearts, our instincts, to follow the best of our natural intelligence and listen to what we really want. It's just so important to make a good distinction between what we really want positively and by itself as opposed to what we want because of the forces of chaos. What we really want is not hidden in the reaction to all the "wrong" that is happening. It's actually inside our true focus, the little funky place on which we know we can focus on with great joy and passion. It does not at all need to be something great. It in itself may actually require an interaction with the chaos, as healing is interaction with a problem and an important task. We as the universes' turmoil need to find healing, actually. The nature of our contribution is unclear on the surface, but within us we have the answer fully, completely and unmistakably. But it's very difficult to peel away all that we've been taught and all that is still practically in the way. We need to shed the dumb restrictions that we so religiously obide by. Such as time...thinking that our lifetime is something finite. Our chance to come closer to the "end of the line" is within every lifetime and won't go away. Well, now, that's a really complicated thought, but that's all part of the cleaning process of our utterly polluted minds.


Hmmmm...let's have a little more fun with all of this then. In terms of wild speculations it doesn't go a whole lot further, does it.
Let's say the two universes had different base compositions, where as one of them had DNA and the other one- for now let's say- something else. All of life is the attempt of the DNA based universe to recompose itself properly. Life's short span as we know it doesn't make a whole lot of sense, given the possibility that it could be complete, perfect enough to arrive at full control over composition, active construction or restructuring, thinking with nearly no limitation, so to say. All the species, all that which we are made to consider evolution is actually nothing but the slowly reconstructing fundamental structure of one of the universes. What if immortality is nothing fancy, but the actual standart or proper constitution of that which manifests through such DNA. What if we are but a fragment of that, which tries to reconnect.
For a moment it kept bouncing around in my head that all of life might be a party of chaos until I felt the possibility of the above. We are always trying to become something. We evaluate what we are by looking at our history, studying all the beings on earth and still hope to find other forms of life in space. A part of us hopes that we find completeness within our world. Other can't imagine it and just know there's more out there. We certainly exhibit the ability of life on earth to piece together bigger and bigger straints of DNA, even optimizing it along the way. Seems to me it puzzles itself together the basic construction that broke off during the collision, or how ever one might think of the original event.
To me, at least, it seems that mortality is a flaw that originates in the unsatisfying composition of life's instructional element and that immortality should never be the goal, but only the side effect of the DNA's perfection.

Alright, are you still with me?

Let's go crazy then...
Pieces of DNA are scattered throughout the universe, planted it would try to reconstruct. Some had more proper pieces, others less. As the appearantly better equipped attempts awoke to this revelation, they began to search the universe for missing pieces. Where ever they'd encounter "life", they'd probe it to find either new elements or examine those different configurations. If there would be something so promissingly different that it was worth it to unite, they'd try that.

I will leave you to this thought. You take it to the next level.

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